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10 Real Life Court Ordered Sentences You Won't Believe

Court Order

It's no surprise to find disorder in the court--accused criminals acting out, trial spectators going nuts over a verdict, that's pretty much expected and we see it live on TV and YouTube all the time. Society counts on the Judge, who basically "owns" the courtroom, to be the voice of sanity and to uphold the law. Some judges, however, hand out some pretty bizarre sentences. Defendants go through a psychological evaluation to see if they are fit to stand trial, and after reading about some of these punishments, some may argue judges should too.

1. Dearly Beloved We Are Gathered Here to Force This Union

East Texas is a crazy place proven by one judge who forced a man to marry his girl or face the slammer. The couple was very much in love and had planned to someday marry, but not like this. The crime was that Josten Bundy had fought with his girlfriend's ex because he insulted his girl, which is understandable, according to the Judge Randall Rogers. The Judge asked Bundy to prove his girl, Elizabeth Jaynes was "worth it" by marrying her within 30 days or get locked up.

Jaynes only 19 years old, was appalled that she had to get her dream proposal in the form of a court mandate, and she, like other girls, dreamed of a fairy tale wedding. Instead they were married, in the courthouse of course. Her father was also not keen on what boiled down to be a shotgun wedding and felt the sentence was disrespectful. Still, it came down to Bundy losing his job if he got locked up, so he took the probation, which included a life sentence of "Till Death Do You Part." The couple says they would have married anyway, but on their terms, not Judge Rogers'.

2. Oh Mandy! Judge Imposes Musical Sentence

A Colorado judge is tough on noise polluters, and dishes out truly horrifying civil punishments, according to UK Telegraph. Judge Paul Sacco made news worldwide when he forced offenders to listen to Barry Manilow to atone for their noise crimes. Tunes from Barney the Dinosaur were also used as instruments of this cruel and unusual torture.

3. "If You Puke, You Puke"

Those words were uttered by Judge Michael A. Cicconetti of the Painesville Municipal Court in Ohio, when he sentenced a woman to 8 hours in the county trash dump. The woman was convicted of neglecting her dogs by letting them live in unbearably filthy conditions. He ordered her to sit in the dirtiest, smelliest area of the garbage dump to see how her dogs must have felt having to live in those conditions. Many commenters applauded the judge's decision, as he spoke up for the abused animals. Seems he found the best way for the pet owner to gain insight into her crime.

4.  Ohio's Judges Got Talent

It seems Judge Cicconetti is not the only Ohio judge with a creative flair. In 2006, Coshocton Municipal Judge David Hostetler handed down a unique punishment to two young men convicted of throwing beer bottles. The pair got to choose their outfits to wear for their punishment, which entailed a stroll down main street--in drag. Apparently "Orange is the New Black" was not their fate, but wigs and heels were the Judge's fashion statement for the guilty duo.

5. Too Brainy For Jail

A rapist who pleaded "no contest" to the charge was excused by Judge Rayford Means of the Philadelphia Court of Common Pleas from having to serve the 11 year mandated sentence because gifted professor Tracy McIntosh's work in the field of brain research was deemed "important" by the sentencing judge. The victim and public were outraged.

6. No Girlfriend for You!

A 24 year old Canadian man, who injured himself after acting out in a bitter battle with his lady love whom rejected him, was sentenced by a Justice Rhys Morgan to no girls until he completes his therapy, instead of jail time, according to The Toronotist.

7. Cicconetti Does It Again!

Just when you think this judge might run out of creative punishments, Judge Michael Cicconetti orders a women who stiffed a cabbie out of his fare to walk 30 miles. It was 60 days in jail or a 30 mile hike, the distance of the cab ride she took for free. Offender Victoria Bascom chose to walk off her punishment, according to Cleveland Judge Cicconetti believes in giving people a taste of their own medicine and has made offenders do novel alternatives to jail time like dressing up in chicken suit or spelling out an apology in coins. He also required a women who abandoned kittens in the woods to spend a night in the wild alone, without food or water.

8. Small Sentence for Shortie

A man was deemed by Sydney, Nebraska Judge Kristine Cecava to be too short to survive in prison. His crime was child molestation. Prison was considered too dangerous for this tiny offender, so he got 10 years probation instead, according to CRSchools.

9. Too Hot for Prison

A Tampa Florida judge, Judge Wayne S. Timmerman, bought the defense's claim that Debra Lafave, who had sex with her 14 year old student, was simply too pretty to be imprisoned. The judge agreed to the plea bargain and the sexy, but mentally disturbed teacher got her teaching license revoked, three years house arrest and probation. Since that time the gorgeous offender has been featured on news reports and photo shoots, instead of scrubbing toilets in the big house for years like other sex offenders. Teachers, students, parents and the general public cried "Foul!" when her light sentence was broadcast around the globe.

10. If the Shirt Fits--Wear it!

Delaware Deputy Attorney General Donald Roberts asked the judge to impose a unique sentence on a 69 year old man who was guilty of exposing himself to children. The shirt says " "I am a registered sex offender."The judge complied with the DA's request and the perpetrator will be remanded to wear the item for 22 days after he leaves jail, according to Reuters.

Garrett Parker

Written by Garrett Parker

Garrett by trade is a personal finance freelance writer and journalist. With over 10 years experience he's covered businesses, CEOs, and investments. However he does like to take on other topics involving some of his personal interests like automobiles, future technologies, and anything else that could change the world.

Read more posts by Garrett Parker

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